And the beat goes on...


So it has been a week. I have been meaning to post and then I just don't. Not too much has been going on but yet stuff has been. Saturday I went to Bloomington to celebrate my friend Tammy's 28th birthday. Crow, Phil, and Ben joined in the celebration. We all went to Chevy's for dinner and then went to see Maggie Speaks at Daddios in downtown Bloomington. That was a good time. I didn't drink a single drink. Which surprised a few people. I just don't have money right now to be drinking much. I don't see the point in only having 1 drink although I don't want to get trashed either but to have a nice toasty feeling I require a few drinks and I don't have the money for that. So I just don't drink. Water has been very good to me lately. Healthy for me too. Sunday I just chilled. Tammy and I hung out and watched movies on Tv all day. Then Phil got home from work and he and I had dinner. Leftover tacos, very good. Then he and I went to see Lori at the BBC and do a little bowling for free. We got back and watched Field of Dreams on DVD. That was good then he went to bed. Well I was wired from drinking a bottle of Mt. Dew. Yeah not a 20 oz but a whole 2 litre. So I was up kind of late and also did Phil's dishes for him. My way of thanking him for dinner and letting me stay at his apartment. Well the next morning he woke me up before he headed to work and I packed my things and was on my way also. I had to go to ISU to get my half refund from my dropped classes this past Spring semester. So I got myself a whopping 484 dollars. That is nice and helps me out alot.

I got to open up a checking account finally. With my newly acquired money. I also got a debit card with my photo on it. I am so stoked. I can't wait until I get it.

Monday was rather boring. Not much went on. Hung out at the bar in the evening because Ed was working. Tuesday I did some cleaning but not much. I had an out of whack schedule. Tuesday night at Midnight Ed and I went to see Spider-Man 2 at the 1st possible showing at midnight. It was a BLAST! I haven't seen a midnight showing in forever. It is so fun because you know the people that are going to those are fun people. Boring people go to bed early and don't concern themselves with trivial things such as seeing midnight showings of movies. They think, "I can catch it later on in the week" but I think, I HAVE TO SEE THIS NOW!

Today I got up at about 11ish. Started cleaning some more. I got the bathroom clean and I cleaned some drawers in my desk. I didn't throw too much away from those but rather organized that. I hung more pictures in my front room. Some people that are best friends were neglected from representation on the wall of my sisters and myself and our friends. So I got some up there with Philly, Shoofly, and Ed. I used to wait for my dad to put photos up because I thought he had a certain order or schematic that he wanted to go by but he said go ahead and so I put some up. So I got them up, and I plan on putting more up too. The only rule is that I have to be in the photo along with my friends. So when you are at my parent's house next check out the wall. New photos are up and I rearranged some photos too while accomodating the new ones.

Tonight I went to Dempsey's because Josh and Lauren wanted me to go with them because there was Kareoke which Dempsey's has every Wednesday. Well I call Josh on my way down and he says he will call me back in 15 minutes, well an hour goes by and I call him again, he says that he and Lauren are going to a friend's house and are not going down to Dempsey's. I'm like what the heck, I've been waiting down here for you. They thought that I was going to a concert with Ed although I explicitly told them that I was not going with Ed. So I was like, forget this and went next door to The Bar. I hung out with Mike and Mandi for the remainder of the evening. Always a good time. Mandi and I chatted a bit. I played some Euchre on the MegaTouch machine. Drank some cheap frozen vodka lemonades and even had a shot of Jack with Mike. Paul Orama came into the bar for his birthday. He was like, "geeez, do you own this place?" and I guess this is because every time he comes in there I am sitting at the bar. I like the place, what can I say? But no I do not own the bar, not even close nor will I ever be close.

So now here I sit, blogging my heart out to you. I plan on mowing tomorrow and cleaning my room some more. I still haven't tackled my closet yet. That will be an adventure. There might be things living in there it is so bad. My sister Jennifer and my brother in law Jeff will be in Springfield and staying at the parents' homestead for a few days. They have a wedding to be in/go to this coming weekend. They have not been home to Springfield since Christmas season. I miss her alot and it will be great to see her and Jeff. Shannon the Chicago sister will be home also, she is taking some time off of work. So it will be a full house again. 6 people in a 3 bedroom house. This is why I have been cleaning my butt off. It is going to be crowded and also we want it to be nice for Jen since she hasn't been home in so long. Parents stay in their room, Jen and Jeff in the "guest bedroom" and I as usual just get my room. Shannon has option to stay in my room but she claims that I snore and refuses to sleep in the same room as me. Although I have slept in the same room as her the past 2 times I have stayed at her place in Chicago. I don't snore....

Live, Love, Laughter - Peace, K

Dear God,


OK, ok, I think that I haven't been tackling this the right way. I had a job interview yesterday and I messed up bad. I believe that I had a really good shot at landing this position with Blue Cross. Heck I was lowering my standards to get my foot in the door. It was for a scanner position in the mail room. I would have been scanning 7 bins of mail into a machine. That's it apparently. I think I am qualified. I thought they liked me. BUT I am not real quick with the answers for the interview questions. I messed one question up that I am not going to discuss because it was a dumb answer and I should have known better. I didn't know how to answer it because IT DID NOT APPLY TO ME! Well, 3rd try at getting into Blue Cross Blue Shield of Illinois is a failure. Mark that one in the books folks. Kyle can't interview worth a dime apparently. I think my dad is going to start putting me through mock interviews because it is obvious that I don't know what the heck I am doing. I need to be able to sell myself better because I know I can do these jobs and these people think that I cannot.

Well, besides that I have applied for non managerial work at Family Video on Macarthur. John Pappas was working there so that was nice to see someone I knew. Hopefully he will be like, oh yeah, I know Kyle he is a really great guy. You should give him an interview to the head manager.

I applied online with Kerasotes Theaters for a managerial position. They have a nice little system set up on their web page to create a resume and then have it sent to the theaters of your choosing. I hear that managers get paid a little better now. Plus the fact that I have been a shift manager with them before I am hoping that maybe they will consider me. Full time manager at a movie theater would be nice, not a peon like I have been in the past but more responsibility. I wish I could just put in my resume, HONEST, DEPENDABLE, LOVES TAKING ON MORE RESPONSIBILITY.


What else, I hear that the new DICK'S Sporting Goods store is hiring people. I should look into that. Natalie says that Bergners is hiring for stock people. I really might have to settle for non 9-5 full time job. I just need somehting that pays well and doesn't kill me.

I would be working the door this Saturday but I have a birthday out of town to go to so Mr. Chad is filling in for me down at the bar.

I AM SO FRUSTRATED! I HATE THIS CRAP! I SHOULD HAVE JUST GONE BACK TO BOX & GO WHEN I HAD THE CHANCE BUT NOOOOOOOOOOO I WAS THINKING ABOUT MY FUTURE AND WANTED A FREAKING FULL TIME JOB WITH BENEFITS. NOW THAT IS LOOKING HARDER AND HARDER TO GET. THE BOX & GO POSITION HAS BEEN FILLED NOW. I AM S.O.L. BABY.


I thank you all for your love and support during this somehow self imposed down time in my life. God help me.

I am a blogger damnit!


So, today was fun. Ed and I... Yes Ed and I we both don't have 9-5 type jobs so we chill quite often. If you would call me up during the afternoon and say lets do something fun I might just join up with you. But seeing as how Ed usually calls me first I tag along with him or is it that he tags along with me. Another chicken and the egg question. Gotta love them. So anyway, Ed and I went to read comic books for free at Barnes and Noble. This is something that I highly recommend to people who like to read. Go to B&N and pick out a book or comic or magazine, you know whatever suits you. Take it to the cafe and sit down and start reading. It is a good free time. Ed and I have read hundreds of dollars worth of comics that we have not paid a dime for. Wonderful isn't it? So we did that to pass time before we went to the movies! Yes you say, how can you go to the movies Kyle, you are so broke right now it isn't even funny. WELL my friend, I went to the movies at White Oaks Mall (my old stomping grounds) and there movies before 6pm are just ONE freakin DOLLAR. So I can easily find that much money to sit in a theater for a few hours and be entertained. So Ed and I saw Starsky and Hutch today. That movie was actually pretty good. It had an Old School feel to it with Vince Vaughn in it. His mannerisms and such were similar but in a good way. I liked it, I laughed, it was enjoyable and I recommend it to fans of Old School and Road Trip and comedies in general. Then after the movie Ed and I wanted to get some dinner so we went to Frankies Bar and Grill which is located in the Jewel Osco 6th street shopping center. I had some burgers there that were very good. Played a bizzaro version of Photo Hunt there that had a different title even cause it was by a different company. SO after that fun time at Frankies Ed dropped me off at my house so I could get cleaned up to still look like trash. You ask, what does he mean by that? Well my friends I decided to go with the self made sleeveless shirt today all day long. Yes, I looked like trash and I was proud of it. Wore it inside out too. So it was just flipflops, jean shorts and an inside out sleeveless tshirt today. It was a wonderful time. I didn't get any comments on my tattoo besides by like 2 people I already know. It was a pretty tame night tonight at the bar, not that many people out that I knew. Shoofly, Melissa, Farah, Kurt. That was about it. Others came and went but those are the ones who hung out like the troopers they are. Ed was working so he doesn't count on the hanging out cause he had to be there.

BTW Ed did not get that job in San Diego. They decided at the last moment to hire from within the company. So they suck for leading him along for so long.

SHOOFLY! when are you going to get your website back up and running? I miss www.justshoo.com I heard you saying something about making a www.just-shoo.com but that hasn't happened yet either. Come on Mr. "I did the blog first" you are neglecting your fans. And yes you DO have fans. Fans you don't even know about probably and a heck of a lot that you do know about. Hell, you were voted Illinois Times #2 Best Website in Springfield last year. How can you win again if you don't have a website to vote for.... DID YOU EVER THINK ABOUT THAT?

My JOB hunt has slowed because I don't know what the heck I am doing. I am about to apply to work for the United States Postal Service. I got an application in the mail today. I will be filling it out in the next day or so. I will see how that goes.

ATTENTION! If you are someone that I know and you have your own blog or website that I don't know about. Tell me it and I will put a link to it on my blog here. You know... off to the right where the links are. Drop me a line or leave a comment with your website blog address and I will link it when I read it.


Live, Love, Laughter - K

Drive In...


Tonight I'm going to the Route 66 Drive In. Yay! Shrek 2 and The Lost Skeleton of Cadavra is playing. It should be good. I loved Shrek and was possibly one of my most favorite movies ever. Ed and I are going. Throw back a few Natural Ices and watch 2 movies for $5.00. Shhhh. Alcohol isn't exactly allowed but it makes it that much more fun.

Today I haven't really done much yet. I woke up a few times and then a few times I went back to sleep. As you can tell now I finally stayed up after one of my wakings. A neat storm rolled through earlier this morning. Knocked down a few big branches as I watched. I busted out the new mach3 razor blades for a nice close shave today. Oh baby. Chatted with Reier, he was taking a nap. Called Ed and he called me back because he was taking a nap also. Anyone else I know was probably at work so I decided to not call them.

I applied for a very part time job at Wild Birds Unlimited yesterday. They said it would only be about 10 hours a week and I'm like that is okay. And it is. So I filled out an application and I am hoping for the best. I could then even find another part time job and juggle it in the meantime. I have bills to pay and an income would be very nice right now.

I hung out at the bar almost all of last night. That was fun. A decent amount of people for a Monday came in. I knew a few of them. I played a huge amount of Wordster and Photo Hunt on the Megatouch Maxx Machine. Ed and I have done very well on Regular Photo Hunt but now we set our sights on Erotic Photo Hunt. It has been neglected for too long. We actually have found that it isn't as hard as Regular Photo Hunt either. So we shall put Regular Photo Hunt on hold for a while and tackle Erotic Photo Hunt because it is our civic duty as die hard Photo Hunt players to set outstandingly high scores.

"Whiskey Down" is diner lingo for the food item Rye Toast.

How is Life?...


So, What's up? Not much here. I didn't leave the house again today. That was fun. I did watch the Cubs win against the Angels in 15 innings, a very stressful game. Still pondering what I am going to do with my life. Haven't really tried insanely hard to find a job since a few possibilities have fallen through or not materialized. I'm probably going to look for a part time job so I can at least have some money coming in. I have been working the door at DH Brown's here every so often and that helps me out some but it isn't enough to sustain me in the least. I do enjoy that very much though. I love people and it is a very social job. I like it because if I see someone I kind of know I can shoot the breeze with them for a minute or two but then they move on. I am not stuck in a conversation that goes nowhere. I have people to card, people to watch, and the people that I know came there to drink so they hit up the bar or get a table and wait for one of the wonderful cocktail waitresses.

Anywho, I haven't had anything to drink since my birthday "observed" which was last Monday. I'm proud of myself. I'm kind of showing myself that I don't need alcohol to have a good time. Which is something that is a good rule to go by for everyone. Alcohol is something but it is not everything. So I have been hanging out and having fun this last week but not drinking. It's all good. I don't know how long I will do this though. Not that I am craving a drink or anything but I feel it is fun to exercise control like this. To say no thanks when people offer you a drink.

In less than 12 days, June 25th is my 1 year aniversary of quitting smoking cigarettes. I am very proud of myself for that. I quit cold turkey from smoking a pack a day (or more, it varied). My lungs are finally doing better I can tell. I can even be in bars lately and not be hacking up crud by the end of the night. I no longer have that persistant cough that kept me up at night and was disgusting and unattractive to hear. It was tough at first, yes, but now I don't even worry about it. I can get drunk as can be and still not smoke. You just have to get it into your head that you are done. No more. Finished. Sure it will cross your mind but you just have to say no, and no is a lot easier than people tell themselves. So if you are a smoker and are reading this, please contemplate quitting. Mainly for yourself, but also for those who care about you. Through the last year I have realized how bad it really is. Sure it is a slow killer, but a killer nonetheless. Who wants to die before their time? Raise you hand right now and say I want to die before I am supposed to and I don't care about those who care about me or myself. Cause that is what smoking does. This is solely my opinion. If you disagree with what I say then fine. That is your opinion and we all are entitled.

So, I can control alcohol, and I can quit cigarettes. Why is it so hard to eat right and exercise? Is it because they are not chemical addictions? I believe it is all mental. It is what a person chooses to do. So why can I not stick to the choice of being healthy? Some say it is easier to be a quitter. Sure, but I can quit other things with ease. Why, why is this obstacle so much more difficult? Beats me, but don't think that being healthy isn't in the back of my mind when I eat something totally unhealthy. I think about it, but for some reason I want what is the worst for me. Every day is a celebration and I treat every day like a celebration. Live it up while you can is what I think. But by living it up all the time that can cause the time you have to live it up become shorter. So is it really worth it to party all the time now and be a glutten of so many things? Wouldn't it be nice to be able to party hearty in 50 years? Shoot, does any of this make sense?

Direction...


I need direction. I have no idea what I am doing and I don't feel like doing it. I have sat at home the past two days barely looking for jobs. I look on Monster and other various sources. I briefly look over the classified ads. What am I looking for? Is there a job out there that says Kyle please apply because this is the one for you? NO! There isn't. I look at everything and say well I could probably do that but at the same time it doesn't seem like I am qualified enough. I feel like a huge phoney all of a sudden and I keep telling myself that I'm not. I'm about to start looking for part time work. I need money. I keep seeing an advertisement for a job position at Wild Birds Unlimited. That could be a cool job. It would provide me with money that I am in need of right now. Cash flow is low. I'm working the door at the Bar this weekend which will provide me with a little extra cash flow to help keep me afloat. That is all I am doing right now anyway, just floating along in the sea of real life. I will wash up on a barren island every so often but what I really need to do is actually swim and find a Metropolitan Pier. I can't afford to float much longer or I will drown. I don't even think that I can afford to drown either.

I lack motivation. I don't feel like looking for motivation to use motivation. I need the easy way out. I need to win the lottery and then not have to deal with this crap. Or just marry a rich girl and have lots of kids and be Mr. Mom. I can do that. I love kids. I just want to sleep, I don't want to do anything, just sleep. When I sleep I am happy. I can be anything and do anything in my dreams. Sure you might say I can do anything I want now... sure... within the confines of reality. Can I go take a cruise right now? NO! I would have to have money. The stuff that the world revolves around. The stuff that doesn't really matter in life. I've got all I need right now family and friends. But I keep getting told that it is not enough. I have to strive for more. I have to strive for money. People insinuate that I can never be happy without money. Once I have money I can be happy. I hate this point in my life. It is the easiest time I will ever have but at the same time I am in the most turmoil and I hate it.

Congratulations to those who have had the drive to finish school and get a job. I can't afford life anymore because I have no motivation. Next time you wonder about life just remember that you have a path that you paved. It can be worse. But could it possibly be better? Probably not.

Thanks for listening, This has been my depressing rant for the day. -K

Direction...


I need direction. I have no idea what I am doing and I don't feel like doing it. I have sat at home the past two days barely looking for jobs. I look on Monster and other various sources. I briefly look over the classified ads. What am I looking for? Is there a job out there that says Kyle please apply because this is the one for you? NO! There isn't. I look at everything and say well I could probably do that but at the same time it doesn't seem like I am qualified enough. I feel like a huge phoney all of a sudden and I keep telling myself that I'm not. I'm about to start looking for part time work. I need money. I keep seeing an advertisement for a job position at Wild Birds Unlimited. That could be a cool job. It would provide me with money that I am in need of right now. Cash flow is low. I'm working the door at the Bar this weekend which will provide me with a little extra cash flow to help keep me afloat. That is all I am doing right now anyway, just floating along in the sea of real life. I will wash up on a barren island every so often but what I really need to do is actually swim and find a Metropolitan Pier. I can't afford to float much longer or I will drown. I don't even think that I can afford to drown either.

I lack motivation. I don't feel like looking for motivation to use motivation. I need the easy way out. I need to win the lottery and then not have to deal with this crap. Or just marry a rich girl and have lots of kids and be Mr. Mom. I can do that. I love kids. I just want to sleep, I don't want to do anything, just sleep. When I sleep I am happy. I can be anything and do anything in my dreams. Sure you might say I can do anything I want now... sure... within the confines of reality. Can I go take a cruise right now? NO! I would have to have money. The stuff that the world revolves around. The stuff that doesn't really matter in life. I've got all I need right now family and friends. But I keep getting told that it is not enough. I have to strive for more. I have to strive for money. People insinuate that I can never be happy without money. Once I have money I can be happy. I hate this point in my life. It is the easiest time I will ever have but at the same time I am in the most turmoil and I hate it.

Congratulations to those who have had the drive to finish school and get a job. I can't afford life anymore because I have no motivation. Next time you wonder about life just remember that you have a path that you paved. It can be worse. But could it possibly be better? Probably not.

Thanks for listening, This has been my depressing rant for the day. -K

HUNG OVER CITY!!!!


OH My Goodness, I was so hung over today I just can't believe it. I have never been this hung over in my life. Usually I can just sleep it off but NO, I had to sleep all day and get sick a few times and wake up at 9:30pm before I felt any better. Let me see if I can recount my evening last night for my 23rd birthday. I went to the Lincoln Park Zoo, no drinks there. After the zoo the family and I went to a dog bar called Vaughn's in which there were dogs running all over the bar and they were supposed to be there. I had a few Micro Brews there, Sierra Nevada, Bells, and Summit. They were good but I've had better. Then we went by Shannon's apartment and I had like 2 beers there. Then we went to dinner at Mi Tierra which is a Mexican Restaurant and it was very good, I had about 4 big glasses of margarita there that I remember. Then they family went to a restaurant bar called The BrickHouse which is pretty new. There they got me a birthday dessert and I had 3 white russians there. Then Shannon and I and her roommate went to a bar called HYE Bar which was cool and I liked it alot, there we stayed til the end of the night and I was drinking my favorite double Captain Sprites all night long. I can't even count those but I'm sure I had more than 6. and I remember doing a Red Headed Slut with my sister for my birthday. I had thought about switching to Long Island Iced Teas all night but I am glad I didn't. If I had I might have alcohol poisoned myself or something cause woooo I had a lot. Well, I knew I was drunk when I had to get sick in the middle of the night. I tried to keep it quiet but my parents heard. I guess it didn't matter that they heard then because I did it 2 or 3 more times throughout the next morning and afternoon. If you had seen me I am sure you thought I was trying out for a new zombie movie because I looked like such a zombie. I tried drinking some lemonade and it came right back up. So my parents went to Arbys on the drive home and I didn't partake in the wonderful food of Arbys because I was so scared that it would come right back up and you know I don't like to waste food. I feel like that is such a waste when that happens. So I didn't eat, I just sat there and watched my parents eat which almost made me sick anyway. WELL, I made it through watching lunch, but then we had to hit the highway again, and the car had heated back up while we were inside, I get in the car, it is hot, I start to get queasy, then the car starts moving and I'm like OH CRAP! so right when we get on the ramp I am like, I'm getting sick! and my dad pulls over and I have to puke on the side of the highway ramp. How fun is that to have your parents sit on the side of the road waiting for you to puke from being hung over from drinking waaaaay too much the night before. I slept almost the whole ride home which is over 3 hours. I am glad I did though because every time I woke up I would look around and get queasy again and I'm like nuh uh, so I would just go back to sleep because then I don't notice the motion of the car much. SO, that recount my night last night. Yes I had sooo much fun, I partied like a rock star on his birthday because it was MY BIRTHDAY! I am now 23. See, I like to have memorable birthdays, 21 I partied it up with all of my friends in Springfield, 22 Ed came up to Normal and treated me to an awesome time that probably wouldn't have happened without him, and this year my parents treated me to everything and let me pick everything all Saturday in CHICAGO! 21 Springfield, 22 Normal, 23 Chicago... I wonder where I will be for my 24th birthday, who knows? Not me, that is for sure.

In other news it appears that President Reagan passed away at the age of 93 on my birthday yesterday. May he rest in peace and godspeed.

Today is the Aniversary of the 1st day of the Dday invasion on the beaches of Normandy. May we all remember the veterans who fought and died and who fought and lived for our freedoms.

Thank you everyone who Called, Emailed, IMed, sent me a card, or verbally wished me a Happy Birthday. Thank you everyone and I love you all in your individual ways.

Greetings...


Hello! Today is my 23rd birthday! I am coming to you from my sister's roommate's computer up in Chicago. Yesterday I went to the Cubs / Pirates game at Wrigley Field and it was Mark Prior's first game back this season. He pitched very well only allowing 2 hits and no runs. The game went bad when Joe Borowski messed it up with only one out left to get in the top of the 9th inning. It was still a great time. Drank some Old Style and had some peanuts and pretzels. Today we are going to the Lincoln Park Zoo which is a nice free zoo here in Chicago. Then we are going out to dinner at a Mexican place called Mi Tierra or something like that. Shannon got me a new cubs shirt for my birthday. Not as cool as the gift I got her for her birthday though. Ed, Shoo, Jenny, Farah, Lori, Mike and whoever else called me at Midnight last night to have a shot for my birthday. Unfortunately I was already in for the night and was just laying on the futon watching some tv and shannon was asleep in the same room with me. Now it is about lunch and we are going to have left overs from pizza last night which we had Gino's East Pizza which was mmm good. I will talk to you later, I have my cell on me

Later! YAY! IT IS MY BIRTHDAY! - K

Job Hunt...


So yeah, I am heading to see a career counselor today. This should be fun. It is one provided by the state of Illinois. I hope it works. I think I found the website of the place I am going and I may have filled in something they would have me do there. So that might save me some time. Filled out my job history and skills and such. I REALLY NEED A JOB! Or at least get one lined up for like in a month. That would be such a load off of my back if I could score a job. I don't have to start right away or I can start tomorrow. It is all good either way as long as I have the job.

I will probably be going to the Drive In tonight. The last night to see The Day After Tomorrow and Van Helsing. That should be fun. Yay for the drive in, I hope it doesn't rain.

Ed should hopefully hear about his job possibility today. If they say they haven't decided yet again then that is not cool at all. Let's hope on hope that they say yes.

Good Question...


To the anonymous person who posted a comment. Ed will find out about if he gets the San Diego job this coming Wednesday the 2nd. The people pushed it back a little further but promised that they would have an answer by Wednesday. So lets all cross our fingers and say a small prayer for Ed because this is such an awesome opportunity.

Memorial Day was an okay day. Hung out with great friends today. I want everyone to know that I am here for you if you need me. I care about all of my friends more than you might know but I am not always able to show this outwardly. If you ever need help, advice, or just someone to vent to I am here and I will listen.

I found 20 dollars tonight. I ROCK!